SkiChicken.com

This morning I saw an article about “Snow Rage” happening up in Quebec, Canada: That’s right, the French speaking ones. People sometimes get so busy trying to get from home to work and work to home, that they forget how wonderful snow is. We at skichicken central headquarters have devised a 4 step plan to help our readers respond to feeling of snow rage in appropriate ways:

1. Launch your body into the air toward a snow drift
It will lighten your mood and remind you of the thrill of being airborn. Snow was actually invented just to be a slippery cushion of fun. It’s in the Bible: Look it up. It’s somewhere in the front.

2. Go skiing or snowboarding in Colorado
Colorado has the freshest air, and the best snow for skiing and snowboarding. Your feelings of snow rage are actually from breathing city air and taking your life too seriously. It’s time to get back to nature. It’s time to purify your body, starting with crisp, clean mountain air. You need breathtaking views, slippery snowy goodness, and the experience that IS Colorado ski country. Find some remote part of Copper Mountain Ski Resort, or Snowmass, and just ENJOY.

3. Snow dance
Hey - you’re not going anywhere any time soon. Might as well enjoy yourself. Dance to celebrate the snow, or it’s melting. What you are snow dancing for is up to you - just break out in a snow dance and let it improve everyone’s mood!

4. Chill
Stand there. Slow down - no one expects you to be on time with that storm. Take your time, examine a few snowflakes if you need to. They’ll be gone before they know it, and so will you.

              

A reader recently found our website by searching Google for an answer to one of the most important questions a skichicken reader can ask: “What time do the slopes close at copper mountain?” Too Damn Early, that’s what time.

The upper lifts close at 3:30pm, the lower lifts at 4pm. Reader, if you are still out there wondering, there’s still time. But leave now!

Just a side note: I was up on Copper Mountain yesterday, and it was dreamy. The snow was perfect, the weather was perfect. It was somewhat busy for a Monday, but those little hidden mountain places were still so quit, and so beautiful.

As I approached the American flyer lift for my final run, I thought “If you don’t keep getting on the lift until 4:01pm, it’s just another form of self hatred.”

              

Ski Chicken Truth: God wouldn’t have made snow slippery if we weren’t supposed to ski on it.

Think of that amazing thing we know as snow. It’s just water, silly. Slippery, sweet water. It lubricates the skis through a little process I call magic. And it dumps upon the mountains. Oodles and oodles of the stuff. Powdery goodness from above, falling every day like Manna did for Moses.

Many people have probably wondered: Are we supposed to ski? Of course! Have you experienced the awesome wonder of creation, looking down from the Cirque at Snowmass? If not, drop EVERYTHING right now and get yer ass up there.

Still here? Shame on you.

              

We are starting a new service here at SkiChicken Central: It’s called Ask SkiChicken. We already have a few questions rolling in via our visitor logs, including this query: “Map of ski resorts near denver airport”. Now, we’re Ski Chickens here, not mappers. But here goes: Loveland is closest to the Denver Airport. Breckenridge, A-Basin, Keystone, Vail, Beaver Creek, and my beloved Copper Mountain Resort are not far behind (And usually have less wind in the high season. They also have places to sleep). This hasn’t been scientifically mapped, measured or manhandled, but those are my initial thoughts. And if you need a shuttle, see my previous post about this new Denver Airport Shuttle Service.

Feel free to send your questions to us at: ask ski chicken at ski chicken dot com. It’s a free service, with questions answered in no particular order. We aren’t relationship experts or anything, but we’ll even take a crack at that if one or both of you ski or ride.

              

There is a new study in showing Guinness protects as well as Aspirin against blood clots. So let me ask - why are we wasting our money on Aspirin? Let’s do a quick comparison:
Aspirin: Prevents Blood Clots
Guinness: Prevents Blood Clots, is tasty.

Aspirin: Stops headaches
Guinness: Probably also stops headaches, provides refreshment.

Aspirin: White in color, devoid of pigment and liveliness
Guinness: Rich in pigment, rich in frothy goodness

Aspirin: Probably makes your stomach bleed and gives you rheumatic fever
Guinness: Coats your stomach lining, protecting you against even the hottest chicken wings.

As you leave the mountain and prepare to board that long plane ride home, know that last pint of guinness is coursing through your veins, lovingly protecting your arteries against a clot!

              

I was just explaining to my son what snow was. Often times we plan out what we are going to say, thinking rationally about it, examining it factually, emotionally, logically, and in other ways. But I’ve found when explaining things to my toddler, these truths just come out. And so, I present a new feature on SkiChicken.com: The SkiChicken Truths. The first of which is: “Snow is like a friend that you ski on.”

              

According to theseEnvironmental watchdogs, Colorado’s Skiing could one day be in jeopardy:

Along with the loss of America’s most popular way to court death, peak melt will also endanger the habitat of several rare species, including the airdog, artic cougar, flamboyant weezy, and most notably, the ski bunny. Ski bunnies have populated the Colorado slopes for over half a century, foraging for Red Bull and vodka and hunted by male skiers for their attractive, pink spandex pelts.

              

It wasn’t me. I have witnesses that can place me in the USA at the time. Apparently, someone stole more than $200,000 worth of Guinness. It sounds like they just pulled up and collected kegs. I didn’t know you could just pull up in a truck and get beer. It’s a good idea.
All in all, 39,600 pints of beer are missing. No one got a good look at the man who took it either. The retail value of the beer was over $235,000!
I bet it was my ski buddy Mike.

              

Ever need a lift up to the mountains from Denver or D.I.A.? A small company is challenging the monopoly in Airport Shuttles transporting folks from Denver to Vail, Aspen, and other Colorado Ski Resorts. I’ve known the company owners of Rocky Mountain Transportation for years, and they love to ski as much as the rest of us ski freaks. They snowboard, too. Next time you need transportation up to one of the ski resorts, I recommend you give them a try.

              

I made my daily visit to Copper Mountain’s website this morning, and saw they had a few more trails open. They had a buttload of snow last weekend, so I thought more of the mountain would be open. I do see my sweet “Upper Collage” run is open, so I might just venture up this afternoon. I also saw loverly is open, which made me ask “What the heck is a loverly, and where is it?” The Copper Mountain Trail Map is NO HELP:
http://www.coppercolorado.com/mountain/trail_map/statictrailmap.htm

Jeez, guys - do I have to roll my own?